spring and covid are competing over air space, vaccine cards are being tucked into safe keeping, and the world is trying to remember The Before. mostly before 2020, but some of us have drifted back much further….
it has been nearly two decades since whispers of bennifer fluttered through the streets. but her transition back into the silver screen’s lights has the block’s very own jennifer lynn wondering if reboots truly are all the rage.
brad pitt and jennifer aniston crossing paths with an awkward hello caught on camera launched a thousand headlines. ben affleck spotted exiting his latest uber driver’s suv will undoubtedly cause equal if not more speculation. i recommend watching this and this space for much more entertaining and informative takes on the bennifer of it all. like most of ana de armas update account’s (and other smaller media outlets such as vulture, vanity fair, and page six) coverage of benjamin géza affleck-boldt, i am far more interested in his choice of beverage than in who he has tricked this week into stopping by the jack in the box drive thru at before dropping him off at rehab.
did you know coke zero is dead? and we have been living in a coke zero free world for years now? i was today years old when i discovered this as i sought to understand the most impending questions left by the Bennifer2021.0 rendezvous: "where did he get the coke ZERO SUGAR™️? did he bring it with him? was it waiting as a treat in the suv? if it was waiting did he request it to be there or was it brought with the intention that someone would surely be craving the cool refreshing taste of coke zero sugar? has anyone ever craved a coke zero, let alone coke zero sugar??? could the man who left j.lo irreparably heartbroken for years be aiming another knife in her pepsi built back?
but as any serious journalist can attest, my quest for the answers to my questions only begot more questions. i still am very unclear on how a singular can of coke zero sugar crept into the claws of jennifer garner’s ex husband. but i am aware that pepsi’s effort to use its crisp, refreshing power to end racism may have left it too busy to overlook the fact that one of their greatest had cozied up to their greatest rival.
desperate for any good news we can find to smile and possibly laugh at, i for one was disgusted by everyone’s willingness to overlook the fact that another one of our pepsi comrades has fallen. only time will tell what this all means….